Life has a very funny way of knocking you back to reality! The past few days have been the worst and the best days of my life.....sounds funny. I am now realizing, as Tuesday approaches that I am having a harder time facing the fact that I will be 30. I know it isn't a hugh number, but I am troubled just the same. I just can't seem to make myself believe that 30 is the new 20...LMAO. I'm not old, just more experienced.
So less then 36 hours and I will have crossed over from twenty something to 30. Can I just freeze time and be 29 forever? Also, why is this so bothersome to me? Is it because I always said I would be done having kids by the time I was 30 and here I am not even close! Is it the fact that I feel the need to be more mature then I am willing to be (Yes I am in love with a vampire....LOL). I wanna be a Toys'R'Us Kid....LOL
I don't understand my frustration and anxiety. Maybe it is all in my head. Maybe I think I will wake up Tuesday morning and have to be placed in a nursing home. Maybe I think I will wake up in so much pain and that every moment will be painful. I guess it the not knowing what to expect. Deep in the back of my mind, it is just another day and I won't see any difference from any other day.
On another Note, John took me out last night for my birthday. He can be so sweet when he actually puts forth an effort. (We can't go out Tuesday night because I will have the baby to watch). We went to our favorite restaurant, Bugaboo Creek Steakhouse and then he surprised me with a trip the Jared's. It was unexpected and I found a beautiful pair of Blue Topaz earrings. I wasn't really expecting too much, just a nice dinner and some time alone with him. But the earrings were a nice surprise.
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